“You teach people how to treat you.” -Dr Phil. Whether you like him, love him, or hate him, this quote, in my opinion, is right on. You have to set boundaries with people in your life. Even if it means losing them, that’s better than allowing yourself to be treated terribly. Another big thing I try to teach my kids. I had to live & learn.”
wow, i just read this and this smacked me in the face and hit me and got my attention. thanks cyndy for posting this on your blog. this makes me think also of “do unto others as you would have them do unto you” and “love one another” and “some people come into your lives for a reason, a season, or a lifetime.” just because you have known someone forever does not mean they have to stay here for the rest of your life. people change and sometimes people don’t accept the changes. some stay, some go. some hang on tighter. some spread their wings and come back. some never look back. but we learn from each experience. we learn. even when it hurts, we learn. and we take the bad with the good. sometimes we lick our wounds and hurt for awhile. sometimes we feel the greatest joy we had ever felt to that point in our life. but we learn and we savor and we go on. and hopefully we take the best of what we have learned and we impact others (new or existing) in our lives MORE because we know the pain, too. if we never experienced the pain, how would we know to savor the joy even more? if a heart feels broken, perhaps it is a new opportunity to have another hole to fill up with something more .. maybe more than ever known before. life keeps getting better and better, i can barely contain my joy at times. each experience brings something more to cherish and look back on fondly. thee pivotal turning point of my life was three years ago when i chose to place God in my life and chose to forgive somebody who i had carried a hat red and anger about for my whole life since i was a kid until that month three years ago. it hasn’t been perfect, but it has been so much better. all those years were darker because i carried that hat red around and it weighed on me. since forgiving and letting go, i have experienced greater happiness, peace, and joy than i ever knew before that month. i did not know i was capable of being so loving and giving. when i chose forgiveness and letting go, it is like something dormant inside of me emerged that i did not know was there. the impact since then has been incredible and keeps getting better. when i let go of all that anger, something else opened up to me. did i just not notice how loving and giving and sweet others are? or are they sweeter now because i am? i don’t really try to be a way with others. i just act like myself. i have never felt more loved by others in my life before. what i missed before because i let anger weigh me down. when i let go of it, the ability to love freely emerged. i don’t want that to ever go dormant again. so grateful.
we are here to experience and share joy. share it with me? kathleen
I was so surprised and honored to see my words on your blog!
That lesson was hard learned for me. One of the things I’m proud to have realized, and changed in my life. I am such a different person now than I was just a few years ago. I grew and learned and got so strong. I am very proud of that!
Thanks for making me feel good. =)
xoxo
amazing how much learning and growing we do even when we are “old”….
i am just amazed that if you throw people into the same room, all of them will come away with a different experience depending on what they are thinking and feeling.
i am always amazed at how much our attitude and our thoughts shine through to others and often bounce back at us.
You are awesome
You’re like my own Mary Poppins sometimes with a spoonful of sugar!
Yes, I wanna share it with you. Anger vs. Forgiveness–an almost daily battle for me, but one worth fighting.
hi cyndy — awh! i love that i happened upon your quote and your follow on remarks last night. what you shared really got to me … slammed me in the face got to me … and that is a good thing. thanks for spreading good.
hi corrine — yes yes.
hi lena — awh lena beana!! **gushing** you are more awesome!! you made me grin!! see? hehehe. thanks for always being soooo good to me. hope your bday was so fun with your loved ones there.
hi angela — good. don’t give up. something better can always be found. thanks for this.
g’day, beany
I think you draw a certain type of people to you. When I first saw your name appearing… was it at cre8buzz? comment after comment you left (or that was left for you) was kind. You exuded kindness. I wanted in on it, since for some reason, I draw rather frank, upfront sort of people. Sorry to ramble, but I was interrupted three times for this one comment– family, the nerve, can’t they see I’m blogging?
hi jeri — awh!! you made my day girl! thanks, beany
A wonderful post Kathleen. What a great reminder. Forgiving and letting go is something I’ve surely struggled with in the past; something I strive for everyday.
hi sandy — thanks for saying so. i continue to need the reminders to this day. appreciate your words, kathleen
singing along:
I’ve been trying to get down … to the heart of the matter. But my flesh gets weak, and my heart seems to shatter so I think it’s about:
forgiveness. forgiveness. even if, even if, you don’t love me anymore.
LOVE. It’s the answer. Forgive others the way you want to be forgiven. That was the toughest lesson for me to learn, but it set me free. Someone “hurt” me … I was, we’re talking, HURT! I couldn’t believe what they had done. Didn’t they realize? Didn’t they know what it would cost me when they did that? Then … one day as I was ironing, it hit me like a ton of bricks. I had done the SAME THING TO THEM, AND I HAD DONE IT FIRST!!! And I never even saw it when I did it. I didn’t even notice. Total absence of malice. I had come from what I was feeling and needing and hadn’t noticed what my choice would do to THEM … THAT’S when I learned that people aren’t trying to ruin our lives. They are just trying to get through theirs. They don’t intentionally harm us. It’s jnust kind of fall out.
And they were SO kind to me and so “grown up” about it when I hurt them. And I was such a … bee-otch. I learned from that that I want to handle my misfortunes with good grace. With class.
Such a good post, Beany baby.
So good, as per usual.
Love love love!
Hi Vinny baby.
hi wendy — glad this was meaningful to you, too. kathleen